Next week...

Dawson will turn 8 in heaven. I guess it is easier for me to think of him that way in heaven...aging just like he would have in his earthly life. D asked in wonder the other night if they have 2nd grade in heaven? I told him that I believe they do and they probably serve cookies for snacks and play all day long. As a parent, it is often times too difficult to come up with answers to those questions. D's ability to understand the complexity of the world is years beyond his peers and I cannot help but wonder if it based on his place in our family. When D was three his teacher asked him how many siblings he had. He boldly stated "two, I have one in heaven and one that lives in Guatemala." That statement broke my heart at the time, but now I see that is his way of showing the compassionate heart in him. Or perhaps it tells me I better start saving for his therapy bills later in life:)

Based on the how crazy our life is right now, I know that the 23rd will come and go with only a slight pause for Dawson's life that was not able to be lived out here with us. In thinking about that day 8 years ago, I wanted to share the words to this song, not yet released by Sanctus Real. It takes me back to the day Dawson was born and in the days that followed.


Mother in a waiting room
Wondering if she’ll hold him soon
In the darkness searching for some light
People say it’ll be alright
People tell you to hold on tight
But what do you have to hold onto tonight?

Where will you find peace when you cry?
In these hard times
it’s not in what you hold on to
It’s in the One who’s holding you tonight

It’s like staring down a wishing well
The voice inside cries for help
You’ve never felt so helpless in your life
And time becomes the enemy
‘Cause you just have to wait and see
While all the world is simply passing by

Where will you find peace when you cry?
In these hard times
it’s not in what you hold on to
It’s in the One who’s holding you tonight

You are safe in the arms of The Father